Matrimony for everyone who follows Sanatana Dharma, of any background
If it were an end, it would end.
Swami Dayananda Saraswati, on why marriage is not an end but a path
Sahadharma helps you find a life partner to share a life of right living with: making right choices that benefit the larger good (dharma). Daily practice, values, how you will raise a family and serve society. Free, and run as community service.
Friendship: the essence of Vedic marriage
Sahadharma rests on Swami Dayananda Saraswati's talk of this name. Marriage is two pilgrims walking together, as friends and equals, using married life as a spiritual practice (sadhana) for their growth.
"Every pilgrim is a traveller, but not every traveller is a pilgrim."
We look for people who see marriage as a pilgrimage with a destination, not only a life to share.
"Marriage is not an end. If it were an end, it would end." It is a means, a spiritual practice.
Profiles ask what each person hopes to grow into. Matching rewards a shared destination over surface sameness.
"Nobody can sharpen a knife on a slab of butter." When you yield, you grow and become richer.
Every profile says where the person is still growing and where they are ready to yield.
After the seven steps, a pledge of lasting friendship, mutual respect and harmony, where neither is superior.
The same questions for both partners, and friendship prompts (sakhya) to begin every conversation.
The touching of hearts (hrdaya sparsha): "I give my heart to you." Not thinking alike, but supporting each other.
We show where two people differ as openly as where they agree, so they can decide with eyes open.
The seven steps of the wedding (saptapadi) are our seven areas of compatibility
- Material wealthMoney, work, simplicity
- Health and strengthFood, lifestyle, intimacy
- Inner wealth and right livingPractice, study, service
- Mutual happinessTemperament, yielding
- Welfare of the familiesElders, home, traditions
- Prosperity in all seasonsLoss, illness, hard times
- Happiness born of wisdomGrowth and inner freedom (moksha)
From Friendship: The Essence of Vedic Marriage by Swami Dayananda Saraswati, transcribed by Chaya Rajaram, edited by Jayshree Ramakrishnan and Krishnakumar (KK) S. Davey (avgsatsang.org).
Nine things to know before marriage
From Swami Paramarthananda's talks on the family stage of life (grihastha ashrama). Every member reads these and makes a simple Resolve (sankalpa) before building a profile. Each applies to both partners equally.
- Know why you marry, and whom it servesFamily life exists for right living: to carry on the family tradition (parampara), pass faith to children, and serve society. Students, elders, guests and people in need all depend on the householder, who offers five daily forms of service (pancha maha yajna).
When the family life is broken, religious life breaks down.
- No crash programmeMarriage is long-drawn, like spiritual life. Duties are duties; don't label them pleasant or unpleasant.
Never add an adjective; adding adjective is inviting stress and strain.
- Hundreds of knots, not threeThrough one relationship comes a great web: in-laws, families, communities.
You think you have put only three knots.
- Be like the rockStepping on the stone at the wedding (ashmarohanam): a mind firm enough to welcome every situation. Firm in adversity, never hard on others.
Unless I am strong, every experience will become traumatic experience.
- Attachment, not over-attachmentOne who manages likes and dislikes (raga-dvesha) makes the home a hermitage.
For one who has mastered likes and dislikes, the home itself is a hermitage.
- No one completes youCompleteness never comes from outside. Marry to give love, not to seek it.
When I am complete I give love.
- Accept both or reject bothA relationship brings joy and pain together. There is no third option.
Be ready for pain also.
- Virtues marriage draws outTolerance, accommodation, forgiveness, trust, and contentment (santosha) with your spouse as God's gift.
It is God's (Bhagavan's) gift and I accept.
- Give the decision timeTake time, consult, then hold firm. No decision is perfect.
Never be hasty in taking a decision and regret lifelong.
I am marrying to give love, not to seek it, and to serve society through our family life. I accept the joys and the pains together. I will take the time this decision deserves.
Drawn from compiled notes on Swami Paramarthananda's talks. Sahadharma never promises a perfect match: as he says, "conflict is mainly because of attachment."
The portals ask who you are. We ask how you will live.
Open to all who follow it
Born into Sanatana Dharma, rediscovered it, or came to it by choice: you are welcome, whatever your skin colour, nationality or birth. We reach beyond temple circles too.
108 questions
54 core and 54 optional, grouped under knowing yourself (svadhyaya) and the seven steps. Plus 18 reflections on your nature and work (guna-karma).
Matches that explain themselves
A few suggestions a week, never swiping. Each names your two strongest steps and one where you differ.
Family, with your consent
Parents can help search and shortlist. Nothing is sent in your name until you approve it, and private answers stay private.
Astrology (jyotisha), your way
An optional horoscope match (guna milan) out of 36. Show it, hide it, or discuss it after you talk. Never part of the score.
Gatherings, not swiping
Monthly spiritual gatherings (satsangs) with partner temples and study centres, where families meet families.
Sahadharma introduces a man (biological male) and a woman (biological female) for marriage, following the traditional wedding vows. We never filter by skin colour, ethnicity, nationality or birth.
For parents of younger children
Not ready for marriage yet? Register a few basic details privately and stay connected to the community: family gatherings and children's values classes near you. No questionnaire.
Safeguards. Children's details are never shown, searched or matched. No photos, no contact of any kind. When your child turns 18 we send you an invitation to pass on; a profile starts only if your child chooses to join and completes it themselves.
Free for everyone
Sahadharma is community service, not a business. Everything is free at launch, supported by voluntary donations.
Free for everyone
- Values Card and all 108 questions
- Matches, interests and chat
- Family Mode and horoscope match
- Spiritual gatherings
Support this service
- One-time or monthly
- Funds ID checks, gatherings and the Wedding Vows Study Circle
- Donations open once Sahadharma is registered as a nonprofit. Join the waitlist to hear first.
Join the waitlist
Be among the first 500 families when Sahadharma opens in your city.
Most good matches come through people who know you
Share Sahadharma with friends, family, and your temple or study group.
I've joined the waitlist for Sahadharma, a free matrimony service for everyone who follows Sanatana Dharma, built on shared values and right living. If you, your children or friends are looking, have a look and register: https://sahadharma.org